I'm currently reading two books by Thich Naht Hahn. One is called, Fear: Essential Wisdom for Getting
Through the Storm, and the
other is No Mud, No Lotus: The
Art of Transforming Suffering. The books are quite similar, with many
overlapping themes and guidelines for practicing mindfulness.
Mindfulness is a meditation practice in which we focus the mind in such a way that we become fully present with each and every moment. This typically involves coordinating our breathing with the mental repetition of mantras, or
phrases, which quiet and focus the mind, relax the body and
sow the seeds of aspiration for a happier life.
The mental repetition of these phrases can calm us down in a
stressful moment or at the start of conflict. They can also lead to the
discovery of what is at the source of our suffering and ultimately to heal it.
In other words, mindfulness practice can lead to less suffering and greater
happiness. Who doesn't want that?
One of the most interesting ideas put forth in Thich Naht Hahn's books is that we may carry
not only the residue of our own early (or previous life) traumas, but also that
of our ancestors - passed to us through their genes. At first that idea seemed
a little far-fetched to me. But in thinking about it, I realized that there are
times when I feel sad or down for no reason. I've done a lot of work to
understand the sources of my own suffering and to work on healing it, so I
think I do have a pretty good handle on most of my "triggers" -
the things that can set off anxiety, fear and sadness in me. So when everything
is otherwise fine and none of those triggers are at play, I have to wonder if
there isn't something to this idea.
Well, lo and behold, just the other day, my teachers posted a link
on their Facebook page about a genetic study of Holocaust survivors and their
descendants. This study seems to definitively show that the genes of the descendants
have mutations not found in their peer population, and that these mutations can
only be attributed to the trauma of their Holocaust survivor ancestors. So our genes, it seems,
actually are carrying the suffering of our
ancestors after all.
I know - it's kind of a freaky idea! But then I thought about my
mom and her mother, and realized that some of the issues they struggled with
have been issues for me too.And I had to wonder, what if if their unhealed wounds are still affecting me?
So as an experiment, I began focusing my mindfulness meditation on
healing these wounds for all of us. In my practice, I invited the wounds to arise and I invited my (deceased) mother and grandmother to be with me while I mentally repeated the phrases of comfort and healing. And you know what? Those periods of
unexplained sadness, fear and anxiety have diminished significantly.
My grandmother was hard to love. But I did love her, in the way that you love people who can be so difficult, yet who belong to you and to your life. Yes, she could be a cruel, raging narcissist, but she was our cruel, raging narcissist. Knowing something about her young life helps me have compassion for
her journey and a little insight into how she became the way she was. Since
focusing my practice on all of us, I have felt forgiveness overtaking any
lingering anger toward her.
I seldom remember my dreams, but the other night, I dreamed about
little yellow chicks. Yes - you know, like Peeps, only alive. Little fuzzy yellow baby chickens like these:
.
When we were small, Grandma used to bring us a small box with
several fuzzy yellow chicks in it on Easter. They were adorable and we loved
them - until they grew into chickens and roosters - at which time we gave them
to local farmers. I hadn't thought about those chicks in years. I think that dream was Grandma's way of saying hello and thanking me for understanding and for forgiving her and helping her heal what she was
never able to heal herself.
Who knows? None of us do, we just choose to believe based on
observation and experience. And my experience has taught me that there is
tremendous healing power in mindfulness meditation, for myself and for others. I'm a believer.
Food for thought. Some of my father's relatives (and I suppose mine) DIDN'T survive the holocaust. And I am pretty certain he carried survivor guilt to the end of his days.
ReplyDeleteThat would not be surprising. Unimaginable suffering for all. Maybe we can help them heal through the lives we lead.
DeleteDear Melissa, thanks for the Holocaust link. I'm not surprised at the finding because I so believe in the Oneness of All Creation and that is with everyone who's ever known existence. Like you, I'm embracing mindfulness. I often fall into thinking about the future and what I need to do for today, tomorrow, next week. Etc. Then I try--gently--to draw my mind back to this moment. Right now. Typing these keys and speaking to you. Let's do this together! Peace.
ReplyDeleteHello Dee! It's fascinating, isn't it? Yes, we are all one, even with those who have hurt us....I'm with you!
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